Let's change that comparison to--It's like a marathon....In that it literally goes ON AND ON AND ON AND ON!!! I never thought I could run a marathon because my lack of dedication and my asthma problems. What is my excuse for learning French?
This experience is so great for me in so many ways. I am really good at being the person everyone wants me to be, and I am really good at pretending to be good all the time.
Here, it is impossible for me to hide. To hide from my flaws, to hide from my fears, to hide from embarrassment. I feel so exposed and unable to plan how to react to each scenario.
I was always the kid, that fell down and got back up as fast as possible and yelled, "I'm okay!" Or the kid that would act like I understood and pretend like I knew what I was doing to spare myself from looking stupid.
Well, the fact is...I can't do that here. It is written all over my face when I have no idea what someone is saying to me.
I am put in the perfect environment for me to grow and realize it is okay to be the stupid one for once. It is okay, and at the end of the day, there are bigger things to worry about.
I have messed up on two or three big things with my host mom. And I don't know if it helps that I don't understand her anger, or if it makes it easier. And I HATE getting in trouble. So, I'm learning how to get over that...slowly...haha.
The coolest part about the whole thing is to realize that my Host Mom still loves me. By that I mean, she hasn't looked at me differently, or put me down, or given up on me. She still smiles at me, and asks me how my day was. She still takes time to figure out what we haven't eaten before, and makes us a sweet French meal. She continues to put up with my hand motions, and funny facial expressions. She still wanted to take me to Normandy.
And I don't know why. I have never had so little to give. I wish I could talk and communicate. I wish I could make jokes with her. Or thank her for all that she has done. Or compliment her on her dress. I could say great things in English. I could add to a conversation more than a hand motion.
It is really great for me to see that great example of love. For no reason really at all. I mean really, I keep joking that in English I have personality and in French I am just a bunch of memorized phrases.
I am so grateful for my Host Mom. I am learning so much from her.
Oh and here are some extra pictures from Normandy.
Our Seafood Dinner!
Eating my first oyster!! I was nervous!
The wonderful Elizabeth and Jean Claude
And we will end with this...
I couldn't help but take a picture with the boy that had the same experience as me...haha